A new free-to-play game on Steam has already racked up, as of writing, over 5,000 reviews… and it released today. Come with me on a magical journey as we discover what the hell is going on here.
Alright, so, Blue Archive is a fantasy, tactical role-playing game developed by NEXON Games and published by NEXON Korea, and it’s available to download on Steam (for free) right now.
This game has actually been out since 2021, but today marks the first time it’s been available to download through Steam.
That might explain what is going on with the reviews, because I’m assuming that the reviewers have played this game elsewhere beforehand (considering it’s been available on Steam for only a few hours).
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Also, just a side note, when I started writing this article ten minutes ago, it had 4,700 reviews. Now it has over 5,000. I expect it could have somewhere around 6,000 by the time I’m finished.
So, what’s earned this game its 93% positive rating? I’ll let the reviewers expla– oh my god, why are all the reviews SO horny?!
“Seeing those chibi characters battle more chibi enemies put a smile on my face, and honestly I haven't smiled for a while now”, writes reviewer LAZY QUEEN.
“In my depressing life, it keeps giving me these tiny moments of joy and they mean much more than I can explain.”
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“Blue Archive is an unmatched, genre-defining, awe-inspiring, life-changing, and revolutionary masterpiece of our time”, states user Yorozuya Sensei.
“No other game has made me buy 100+ doujinshis of it like Blue Archive has. 10/10 Game of the Millenium.”
I swear to god, these were genuinely the least unhinged reviews I could find for the game on Steam.
Is the game actually fun to play? Who knows, honestly. You’re genuinely going to have to just play this one to find out, because the reviewers are actually useless this time around.
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Merely touching grass will not cure you. You may need to become one with an entire forest to purge yourself. God knows what you’ve done, and he will not forgive.
Topics: Steam, Valve, Free Games